Many posts today, and Brady tells me to stop, but my heart is so full.
When Brady and I found out McKenzi had Down syndrome, so many thoughts went through our heads. It has truly been one of the hardest and most rewarding opportunties we have been blessed with. One of our nurses gave us a poem the day we left the hospital called, "Welcome to Holland." It talks about the reality of raising a child with special needs and compares it to a person preparing to visit Italy.
Welcome to Holland"
By Emily Perl Kingsley, 1987. All rights reserved.
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss. But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.
McKenzi had her first Primary Program! She was the opening line after signing "I am a Child of God". She said in her cute babble, "I am a child of God. I am created in His image." I had to translate for all to hear, but I learned so much from this experience. While all of the other three year olds and primary children sat on the stand well, I had to hold McKenzi on my lap and help her to sit reverently. (We actually had to leave the stand half-way through when he shoe velcro caught my nylons and made a hole. She was trying to fix it and I was trying to have her be quiet!) While the others had their lines and paragraphs memorized and done so well, we smiled at McKenzi's babble, but could understand none of it. I felt like I was sitting watching "Italy" rush before my eyes and feeling sorry for myself because I did not have the most learned child, when McKenzi reached up, wrapped her arms around my neck and gave me a huge kiss.
That is when I was reminded I was blessed to live in Holland! She taught all of us with her babble. She is such a sweet spirit who is truly created in His image. What a great blessing she has been in out home. She teaches me so much about patience and love everyday. There are hard days and days when I feel sorry for myself, but It is truly an honor to have her our home and feel and learn so many things I know not all have the opportunity. I am especially grateful for a patient Heavenly Father who allows me to be a mother to one of His most blessed spirits. So many wonderful people have come into our lives and we have had the chance to do and participate in many experiences we would not have had otherwise. It has been a great four years (almost!) living in Holland and I would not trade any of it for the world.
When Brady and I found out McKenzi had Down syndrome, so many thoughts went through our heads. It has truly been one of the hardest and most rewarding opportunties we have been blessed with. One of our nurses gave us a poem the day we left the hospital called, "Welcome to Holland." It talks about the reality of raising a child with special needs and compares it to a person preparing to visit Italy.
Welcome to Holland"
By Emily Perl Kingsley, 1987. All rights reserved.
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss. But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.
McKenzi had her first Primary Program! She was the opening line after signing "I am a Child of God". She said in her cute babble, "I am a child of God. I am created in His image." I had to translate for all to hear, but I learned so much from this experience. While all of the other three year olds and primary children sat on the stand well, I had to hold McKenzi on my lap and help her to sit reverently. (We actually had to leave the stand half-way through when he shoe velcro caught my nylons and made a hole. She was trying to fix it and I was trying to have her be quiet!) While the others had their lines and paragraphs memorized and done so well, we smiled at McKenzi's babble, but could understand none of it. I felt like I was sitting watching "Italy" rush before my eyes and feeling sorry for myself because I did not have the most learned child, when McKenzi reached up, wrapped her arms around my neck and gave me a huge kiss.
That is when I was reminded I was blessed to live in Holland! She taught all of us with her babble. She is such a sweet spirit who is truly created in His image. What a great blessing she has been in out home. She teaches me so much about patience and love everyday. There are hard days and days when I feel sorry for myself, but It is truly an honor to have her our home and feel and learn so many things I know not all have the opportunity. I am especially grateful for a patient Heavenly Father who allows me to be a mother to one of His most blessed spirits. So many wonderful people have come into our lives and we have had the chance to do and participate in many experiences we would not have had otherwise. It has been a great four years (almost!) living in Holland and I would not trade any of it for the world.
